Introduction

 

A friend first introduced me to meditation in my teenage years. I imagine this was the first “meditative” experience for many of us; it certainly gave us that alternative edge that we so often look for at this particular juncture of our lives. At first, I felt caught up in the mystique of it all—exotic incense permeated the room, well-seasoned meditators all sat in various stages of the lotus position—it was an exciting new experience, yet I wondered, once I had stepped back into the real world, how could it really be of any use?

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You may have experienced meditation in the same way and perhaps felt the practice wasn’t exactly applicable to your day-to-day life. The image of the Zen-like guru in full lotus position has been weaving its mystical web for so long, the practice itself may seem rather antiquated and not really an essential part of modern living.

Over the years, meditation has come in and out of my life like an old friend; I fall back into a natural pattern within moments of meeting again, yet I have often felt that the hour-long sessions are a bit much for me and that I didn't need “that much meditation” in one go. And so began an overhaul of my routine, a “meditation makeover,” if you will. I crafted much smaller, bite-sized sessions, which could realistically fit into my daily schedule, and a routine that actually worked for me. I instantly felt more comfortable and relaxed, with no added pressure.

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Our routines have to adapt continually to meet the ever-changing demands of our very real life commitments, and it is natural then that our meditation practice has to readjust accordingly—whether you decide on a daily five minutes, fifteen minutes, or simply integrate mindfulness into your lifestyle—use the practice in the way you want and don’t be governed by what the current trend calls for. Meditation has a habit of coming in and out of fashion, but what remains true is that the practice works because it is essentially about cultivating a better understanding of who we are in the here and now. As the world continues to speed up, meditation keeps us grounded in the present, the only place we can ever truly “be.”

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​I think the “why” in “why meditation?” is a perfectly valid question, and one that I encourage you to ask. After all, meditation is now a possible addition to your agenda, and how many hours of the day do we have for our own personal and private use? Our schedules are often tough, and the days and years seem to speed up at an incredible rate. It was with this thought in mind that I started to consider how new endeavors are an investment in time and have to be accessible for anyone willing to give them a go. The exercises that I suggest are designed to fit into the most hectic of schedules, so the practice of meditation instantly opens up and not only becomes accessible, but above all approachable. This book will help you get started with meditation right here, right now, so you have the basic tools to start developing your practice. The thing is that you don’t have to worry about whether you can fit it in because meditation will bend to fit into your life; it’s that simple.

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The benefits of meditation​

The practice of meditation is already well known for helping with a variety of issues we may be familiar with or have experienced ourselves. For example, meditation helps alleviate stress and anxiety, improves communication issues, helps bring greater clarity to our thoughts and 

actions, strengthens our concentration, increases self-awareness, and helps us to feel more objective about situations that are troubling to us.

... alleviate stress, strengthen concentration, and increase self-awareness ...

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The well-being benefits are enough for anyone to think, “I’ll give it a go,” but what marks this practice out in a world of ever-changing health fads is that meditation quietly works away in the background, ever reliable, and can be picked up with relative ease, without requiring hours of time or even considerable investment.

Meditation doesn’t hand you the answers on a plate, rather, it allows you to come up with the answers for yourself. I have often likened meditation to that friend who just sits with you while you come up with your own answers. You inevitably thank your friend for their help when, in fact, you came up with everything on your own. You just needed that space, that inner sanctuary, to discover what you already knew.

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Have a beginner’s mindset​

The concept of “beginner’s mind” originates in Zen Buddhism and was popularized by Shunryu Suzuki in his book Zen Mind, Beginner’s Mind. Cultivating this way of thinking allows you to approach new experiences free from any predisposed worries, doubts, or uncertainty. Applying a beginner’s mindset to these meditation exercises will allow you to simply experience the moment as it unfolds. You may initially experience the pangs of frustration that can overcome a first practice, but just allow yourself to sit with these feelings and observe how they become less and less prominent as you remain firmly in the moment. We are all so used to living our lives at a frenetic pace that, when we consciously choose to slow down, it can be uncomfortable and unfamiliar. One of the key themes we will explore is allowing yourself to feel and to be open to your present emotions, however imperfect they may appear to you. Take your time with this book, and don’t feel you need to launch yourself into meditation overload. The meditations are designed for you to dip in and out of and to experiment with so that you can cultivate a realistic and resonant practice. Meditation doesn’t require you to be that perfect enlightened being we may have read about in books, it just requires you to be, nothing more.

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Time for you​

Taking time out for us is often at the very bottom of our to-do list; it may not even be a priority at all. It’s far easier to relegate our needs to the bottom rung of importance, and yet it is vital that we do pencil in time for our own needs, even if that means taking a few minutes out of our day just to sit and breathe. Meditation is simply the practice of being in the moment: allowing yourself the time to focus on a singular activity, whether you follow the rhythm and sound of your own breathing, become more aware of your presence and the sensations in your body, or maybe just observe your steps as you take a walk. It is that unique moment in your day when you allow yourself to pause for greater reflection and understanding, which helps calm and de-clutter the mind. We rarely allow ourselves that time and put enormous pressure on ourselves to be “doing” at every moment, be it working ever-longer hours or making sure we keep up with the current trends and fashions so that the outside is looking perfect, leaving little if not any room for our inner life. You could say that meditation is taking care of the “inner business” of living, helping us maintain a good balance between the inner and outer aspects of our lives.

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A very brief history of meditation​

Meditation has been practiced for thousands of years; its origins span many cultures and traditions, each with their own specific way of practicing. Although the “meditation route” may differ, the end result is the common thread that ties the practice together. The aim is ultimately to find a deeper and clearer understanding of the self.

 

The most identifiable icon in meditation history is the Buddha; his birth is widely thought to date back as far as 563 BCE. As a young man, Siddhartha (as he was then known) made it his life’s purpose to find the cause of man’s pain and suffering. After an extensive period of self-discovery, he became enlightened. His subsequent teachings emphasized meditation and, in particular, mindfulness—the act of becoming fully aware of our body, thoughts, and feelings in order to better understand the self—as a central component of his awakening. The beauty of mindfulness meditation is that as much as the roots are in Buddhist tradition, it is practiced secularly and doesn’t require any belief system whatsoever. In fact, mindfulness can be integrated at any moment, not just during meditation practice.

If you fast-forward to the present day, the core ideals of meditation have remained—those of compassion, awareness, and a greater understanding of the self—yet the practice isn’t confined to a temple or a shrine, but instead can be carried out in the comfort of your own living room. You could say that the practice has traveled far and wide to where it needs to be in people’s lives right now.

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Misconceptions about meditation​

If we can dispel any of the old myths attached to meditation, we can set off in the right frame of mind without any misconceptions, which may limit our knowledge of what the practice can actually do for us. Here are just a few things to bear in mind before you set about your meditative journey.

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WHAT MEDITATION IS

A means to help attain greater clarity and focus.

 

A way to help better integrate you into your life, not take you away from it.

 

A practice to help you find a greater appreciation of your inner self and life in general.

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WHAT MEDITATION IS NOT

A quick fix for inner well-being.

 

A way to escape reality.

 

An exercise in “who meditates the best.”

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Advice from a meditator​

After reading this chapter, I would advise progressing on to my suggestions on posture, setting up your meditation space, and so on. However, I know it is tempting to skip to the actual meditation exercises, and this book can indeed be read in a variety of ways. If you have prior experience of the practice, this book may be an aid for further ideas on how to get more variety into your daily meditations, so you may skip to the later chapters. If you are new to meditation, it stands to reason that you will read on to find information on setting up and how to prepare for the meditations to come.

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Here are a few little pearls of wisdom I have picked up on my meditative journey to help you get the most out of the experience. Sometimes it really is the little things that make all the difference:

... choose a peaceful environment and take a mindful approach to any distractions ...

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Phone on silent

Cellphones are never far from our fingertips, so you would think that most people would know when and where to leave them on and, more importantly, when to switch them off. I can’t think of anything more tiresome than suddenly hearing the latest ringtone echoing loudly around the room. For your meditation session you want as peaceful an environment as possible, not only for yourself, but also if you decide to meditate with a partner or even a group of friends. When I meditate at home, I simply leave my phone in another room to ensure it is out of sight and out of mind. If I am attending a class, I check and then double-check to ensure there will be no embarrassing sounds emanating from my handbag halfway through the session. Cellphones are the ultimate technological temptation, so the quicker this little meditation faux pas is removed, the better. Of course, no conditions will ever be perfect, so if you do hear a cellphone ringing, simply integrate a mindful approach and allow yourself to be aware of the sound without feeling anxious about it.

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Comfort is key

Feeling comfortable is vital to the quality of your meditation. If you are in discomfort, just gently alter your position so you are at ease, relaxed, and alert. In the past, I have gone to meditation groups where I have been in discomfort and haven’t altered my position for fear I would distract other people, so I have been sitting on an almost dead leg. I don’t know what I thought I would get out of the situation, and I felt more stressed leaving the session than on entering, so I quickly learned that moving out of one position and into another was not failing myself or somehow voiding the session entirely, but was in fact taking control and learning to be mindful of my body and discomfort trigger points.

As you begin to meditate, you will soon notice that when your body is at ease, your mind soon follows suit. The mind and body are inextricably linked and the two must work well together if you are to really benefit from your meditative practice. If your mind is racing, your body will be agitated, and if you are physically uncomfortable, you will be unable to quiet your mind. Assuming a comfortable meditation position is of the utmost importance.

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Creating your bespoke meditation

Meditation isn’t a “one size fits all” practice and can be bespoke to fit your specific needs. You may find, for example, that ten minutes is your meditation “magic number,” for others it may seem too short a time frame, so they would lengthen the session accordingly. There are no rules that apply to a meditation routine; after all, anything too restrictive may feel suffocating, and something that doesn’t keep your attention and focus may seem rather superfluous. Finding that meditative balance will instead help you build a session that resonates with you and integrates into your lifestyle.

If you are at the beginning of your meditative journey, I suggest starting with a simple five minutes. In order to monitor your time, keep a watch at your side to track your personalized session. Of course, as you progress, you will get a sense of your timings and will be able to listen to your own internal clock.

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Do what feels right for you

We are all different in terms of what meditation positions, styles, and surroundings work for us. There is no right or wrong way to get the benefits of meditation, it’s all about what works and resonates for you. You may find that a seated meditation is not preferable for your needs and lifestyle, so simply adapt your practice to an “on the go” meditation, such as a brisk walk or a run on the treadmill, incorporating a more mindful approach. You can incorporate a meditative practice almost anywhere and at any time. I think there is still a misconception that if you are not in full lotus position you aren’t able to reap the benefits of meditation; I would encourage you to throw out the old stereotypes and begin your practice with a clean slate.

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Record your practice

It can be useful to chart your own progress by journaling your experiences pre- and post-meditation. The only real barometer of meditation’s effectiveness is in the practice, so stay mindful of your progress. It can be particularly helpful to keep a note of your initial time frames; in your journal, write down how long it takes you to prepare for a session, and also jot down any comments about what particular type of meditation works for you. When you’re just starting out on your meditation journey, keep a record of all your practice, whether it is five minutes early in the morning or a longer, more relaxed, evening session.

... you can practice meditation anywhere and at any time ...

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What helps you get into your meditation “space?”

You may decide, for example, that you need a little background music as you meditate. This is perfectly fine, just as long as it isn’t distracting or overly emotive. Try music without lyrics, with the aim of finding something that eases you into the meditation rather than pulling you away from it. Think about the sounds that really resonate with you and make you feel calm and centered. You may also find that you have a ritual that helps you get into the meditation “space,” perhaps dedicating a small area of your home to meditation or setting up your chair for such purposes. Make a note of what you enjoy doing and then customize your practice to match your needs.

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Which meditation actually works for you?

We are all unique and have completely different meditative needs. As you begin on your meditation journey, start to get a sense for which exercises resonate with you. Don't worry if it takes a while to find the right fit, just enjoy experimenting with the various meditations this book offers and allow the experience to evolve at its own pace.

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Your meditation, your experience

As we embark on any new activity, we are likely to already have some background understanding of what it is all about; this is made far easier nowadays with the Internet providing a wealth of information only a few clicks away. We can search through thousands of virtual pages full of advice, facts, histories, essays… The information at our fingertips is positively endless. The one thing we don’t get from an Internet search, however, is the ability to form an unbiased, non-judgmental view of our new activity. Internet research ensures we have the opinion of virtually everyone who has ever spoken on the subject. The vast amount of information available to us doesn’t stop there, either; we are just as likely to gather opinions from the people around us: “Oh yes, I meditate all the time… This is what happens and the best way to do it is…“ or ”the only way to meditate is in this position…”

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While this mass of opinions is useful and any subject will have innumerable points of view—even this book is coming from my own experiential knowledge of the practice—by cultivating the “beginner’s mind” we become open to what the new experience can bring. The beginner’s mind gives us freedom as it encourages a willingness to value our own unique perspective and to experience meditation truly in the moment. Acquiring useful information on your chosen subject is well worthwhile, but nothing takes the place of real understanding, which comes from personal experience.

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